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Home Page for Deamer's Writing
Letter to Jeanne (inspired by my friend being a doctor in Haiti during the earthquake) As the images of the earthquake in Haiti bludgeon me and the descriptions of the horror starts to sink in, I realize that you are right in the middle of all this devastation. A sickness spreads through me, as I understand that you could be one of the causalities. It was just two days ago that you emailed me from the Dominican Republic--the day before you would return to Haiti. It was just this morning that I replied. We spoke of a hope that the poor economy might inspire the world to put less value in material things. What a gross exaggeration for the survivors of Haiti, so many stripped of their possessions and left with only a desire for the most essential things of life--to survive and help their love ones survive. Haiti's troubled history and your work as a doctor with Médecins Sans Frontières, provoked me to finish my email with 'keep up the good work and stay safe'. Little did I know that just hours later these words would seem like such an understatement. As the news filters in, I sense that you are physically ok. No particular reason, I just feel it. I then begin to wonder what it must be like for you to be in the middle of this tragedy. On the one hand being a doctor would give you an immediate direction that most survivors would not know. Yet this sense of purpose also gives you an incredible responsibility that you can not hide from. I don't know if your shelter has been destroyed, if your colleagues are ok, let alone all the people you've met, treated and befriended since your arrival in the country. Do you even know how much destruction has taken place? I wonder if you were in a clinic or hospital when the earth left the deep scares in an already tragic filled Haitian history. I refuse to think of you as trapped in the rubble that so many feel wrapped around their bodies and fate. I imagine you have little time to contemplate any of these questions as the depth of death and injury overtakes you. The helplessness of being so far from you and everyone needing help in Haiti, inspires me to write you this letter to let you know that even though we are so far apart, that my heart and mind is with you. I can only hope that by focusing my attention on you that you will feel more strength in dealing with things no one should ever have to deal with. I try to imagine what it must be like for you as a contemplative internal medicine doctor to deal with the brutality and urgency of all the injuries thrust on you. I hope that all the time you've spent in such poor and needy parts of the world will help you deal with the degree of pain you must now be facing. I also hope you spent some time in your career in emergency care, but I realize nothing could prepare any doctor for what is now in front of you, behind you and desperately trying to make its way to you. As we see more of the conditions and destruction I must wonder how many harsh decisions do you have to make. Are all your pains killers gone, have you run out of antibiotics? Do you have to prioritize whom you treat? Do you have to decide who doesn't have the best chance of surviving? Are you performing medicine you were never trained to do like taking off someone's limb? As the week goes on and we learn more of the shortages and the inability of so many to get the medical care they need, I'm forced to imagine that your circumstances are getting only more difficult. Have you slept? Do you and your patients have access to food and water? Have dwindling supplies, forced you to use 'jungle medicine' to provide some relief and temporary assistance to an unending supply of damaged beings? Are you contemplating the reality that many of those you are looking after will die if they can't get surgery or even inexpensive antibiotics? Has the beginning of unrest begun to show its ugly self anywhere near you? Again this letter is my way of letting you know that I, and millions of others, have been thinking about you, the service you are providing and all those who have suffered from this tragedy. I hope to forward it to you as soon as you magically return to the grid and hope it inspires you to write back and share your experiences when you have time. Hopefully your sharing of this incredible moment in your life will help you let go of some of the devastation and help you hold on to the good performed by you and so many others. Keep up the good work and stay safe, Deamer |
Digital Print Pricing painting series titled "Abstract Landscapes"  View Deamer's newest Digital Art series "Digital Landscapes"  |
